Thursday, April 25, 2013

Misty vs The Universe ~ Part 2

Welcome back! In cased you missed it, I posted the first part of this story yesterday, so go catch up!

Okay, where were we?

There was this guy:

Then I’m seated next to stale-breath guy in the middle seat of the teeny-tiny coach-class row tweeting my pain to anyone who will listen.

Now, you’re probably dying to know how in the hell the Universe could have made things worse for me? Can’t imagine it? Oh, come on. You’re WRITERS! If you were the Universe playing a practical joke, ha ha it’s so funny, what would you do to snarky ol’ me?

Would you… Possibly…

Sit me next to THIS GUY??????

Why yes. Yes, you would.

You guys. I am not lying to you…it was creepy staring guy.

Let’s say that one more time for those who didn’t hear in the back: It was creepy staring guy.

Universe, you are a cruel, cruel mistress.

So help me, I thought I was going to die right then and there. I have prayed to whoever is listening to somehow get me out of any future conversations with strangers before, but now I was ready to give a blood oath or something. I mean, really, Universe??? Really.


Okay. *breathes deep* CSG sits and I’m studiously ignoring him. Mumbling my silent prayers when the tap on the arm comes.

I’m sitting on CSG’s seatbelt. Or so he says. Because I wasn’t. I happened to be sitting on my own! Not! His! MINE!

Dear CSG, please don’t make shit up to talk to women, m’kaythanks.


Where was I?

Oh. Right. The rest of the story.

No, it’s not over.


Now, the Universe has had it’s fun with me. (*pats U’s shoulder* Good play, yo. Good play.) I will endure and survive because I gave a blood oath.


YEP! There’s an “except.”

If you live in the No. Virginia/Maryland area, you may remember the bad storm that passed through last Friday. Tornado Warnings… All the fancy thunder and lightning… The flight delays…

I mean, for feck’s sake! I’m on the plane. Seated between stale breath guy and creepy staring guy. For real, Universe?! You’re going to delay my flight? With me ON IT?

Universe – 3

Misty – 0



  1. Ha! That was funny. I travel a lot for work.

    Have you ever sat next to "Mr. Smalltalk Guy?" You'd think the earphones would be a hint, right?

    1. God no, lol. I'd die. I'm such an introvert. Smalltalk Guy would do me in!


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